excuse me mom but whoever smelt it dealt it so it is in fact YOU who’s doing the weed
My parents are both pastors and once I was fucking this one dude who’s dad was the pastor of the rival church and he whispered ‘talk biblical to me’ so i started reciting Psalms 23 and we ended up getting into a competition of who could recite the most bible versus before they cummed
you need less jesus
being 17 is weird because you can get hit on by 14-year-olds and 20-year-olds and it’s THE SAME AGE DIFFERENCE
It’s also weird because you can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life. You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen
never ask white people what their ethnicity is unless you wanna hear a list of every european country and meaningless fractions
Meal plan: $1,457
The sun: $3,381
- Women: I'm pregnant what should I do?
- Pro life: keep the baby!
- Women: okay! Can I have prenatal vitamins?
- Pro life: what?
- Women: can I have financial help for doctor appointments?
- Pro life: ummm.....
- Women: can I at least get paid maternity leave?
- Pro life: ummm... Excuse me?
- Women: the baby is here can I get financial help?
- Pro life: I'm sorry do we know you?